Blog
Where I share ideas and tools to help you find your way.
Note: I’ve been re-doing my website, and on the list is re-visiting how I organize information on this page. Right now, it’s a little-out-of date. But, I’m on it! Stay tuned for some updates.
You can click on a Blog Post in the menu above to get my current and latest posts!
< Your Path to Purpose >
Purpose through pain isn’t something we’d choose. But sometimes it chooses you. It could be the illness of someone you love that sets you on a path. It could be an injustice in your community. It could be a rift in your family. The pain motivates you to find a solution and then you don’t want others to suffer the way you did. So, you find a way to help.
< 2021 >
Do you have enough information to create a plan and go after it? Or, do you keep looking for more information long past when it is helpful? Sometimes we need to be onto ourselves. One way to do this is to realize if you’re someone who avoids action and would rather stay in information-gathering mode. Where are you full of information?
One year into the pandemic and people are choosing to stay put in their jobs. For now. It just seems to risk to onboard remotely. Makes sense. It also makes sense in regular times. In this blog post, I share reasons to stay for as long as you can in your current job. (Not always what you want to hear.)
After the longest year of our lives, it feels good to start over. It may not be all we hope for, but at least it’s not 2020. What do you want to leave behind? Let it go. When everything slowed down, what did you rediscover, reinvent, reclaim. Let’s bring that good stuff forward! In this post, I ask a series of questions to help you do just this.
< 2020 >
If you look back on December 2019 and then think about yourself now, you’ll notice it. You’ve changed. Maybe more this year than any other. How have you changed? Sure enough, you’ll be standing in December 2021 looking back on another year. How will you wish you’d changed? This post is a starting place to ensure you don’t waste one more year.
It’s a life passage that is upon us all in our late 50’s. We’ve done this once before in our late 20’s. It’s a time of life when things may grind to a halt. It’s easier when you’re prepared or if you’ve already done the work of looking ahead, instead of behind. Find out more about Your 2nd Saturn Return.
2020 sucks. And it’s not over yet. We still have the fall and it might be time to buckle up. I suggest having a plan in place for when it all gets to be too much. A great place to start is with a thought-plan. It’s not the time to give up. It’s the time to get going. Stay in the game with a thought-plan.
It’s September and it’s the traditional time to get back into the swing of things. If you’re hitting the wall – you know, the pandemic #newnormal wall – I have some resources to help you move forward again. Even in a pandemic. In my coaching I help midlife women move through transitions in their work and in their lives. With that in mind, these resources are specifically for you if you’re in the middle of life. Have a look!
Sometimes we need to go. It’s time. But, other times, it can feel like we need to make a change right away. Is that true? In this post, I explore the idea of “Good enough. For now.” It’s a reframe that allows you some space to check-in so you can assess, evaluate, make a plan. This helps you make more regret-free moves in your life. While I realize it can be hard to day, as long as you’re not in danger, it might be the best move. For now.
Society’s idea of self-care for women seems to be pedicures and manicures. I may be in the minority but those don’t really appeal to me that much. They’re more like things I need to endure to belong. Self-care for me is reading something inspiring or helpful. Self-care is finding some peace inside myself. That’s why I created Self-Care for Troubled Times. It includes a bunch of concepts and tools designed to take care of your inner self. Give one a try!
As the pandemic surged in different parts of the country, I found myself in a new stage of this pandemic. At first it felt like a snow storm reprieve, then it felt like all we needed to do was hit the pause button for a couple of months and all would be well. Now, it feels like we’ll be “here” (where?) for awhile. My anxiety surged. I had to dig into my anxiety tool-belt for some help. Here’s one of the really helpful tools I reached for. I hope it can help you too, if you have moments when anxiety takes over.
When things are getting you down, it’s time to light up your imagination. Metaphors found in nature can light that spark inside you. You don’t have to travel to Yosemite or Hawaii the Grand Canyon. You can just visit your own back yard or your balcony and watch what catches your eye. For me, Mama Sparrow teaching her kids to fly had a profound message for me. Life is talking to us. We just need to notice.
What if we had the answers after all? What if we all looked “in here” for answers, instead of “out there”. We’d save a lot of time and energy. In this post, I share how yoga taught me how to look at the uncomfortable parts in my body if I wanted to move my practice forward. This practice also applies to life. Looking into the discomfort, in a mindful way, is where the information is.
Feeling a little out of sorts? Yeah, me too. It’s my first pandemic so I’m still getting oriented. 🙂 That’s why I created a free resource to help us take care of ourselves during these troubled times. The theme is Be Still and Know. Learn some simple and reliable tools to help you find your calm place inside when the world is anything but calm.
I have found the idea of a Square One to be one of the most helpful things when it comes to understanding change and transformation.
It’s pretty simple. Something happens. In this case, it’s a global pandemic. There’s a “before” and there’s an “after”. The first stage of the “after” is, what we call in our coaching method, a Square One.
This post provides some insight on navigating your own Square One.
Another week of quarantine. Another week of uncertainty. Another week of news to digest. It’s a lot. Be gentle with yourself. Have compassion for your own process. What seemed perfectly reasonable yesterday, may seem woefully out of date today. Go easy on yourself. This is all completely new for you, for all of us. You’re doing great.
Back near the beginning of the pandemic, I entered a really quiet, peaceful period. It felt odd, given the panic around me. Within this quiet time, I felt more like myself than I’d felt in a long time. It made me realize that I had been functioning in a way that no longer fit me. I’m wondering if you’re noticing anything like this as you navigate these times.
Another week of quarantine. Another week of uncertainty. Another week of news to digest. It’s a lot. Be gentle with yourself. Have compassion for your own process. What seemed perfectly reasonable yesterday, may seem woefully out of date today. Go easy on yourself. This is all completely new for you, for all of us. You’re doing great.
There will be an after. We just don’t know what it looks like yet. In the meantime, here we are, alternating our night pajamas with our day pajamas, furtively checking our corona hair in the mirror. Over the next little while, we’ll each, in our own ways, be making friends with uncertainty, wrestling our fears and anxieties in our individual dark nights of the soul. It may feel like we’re alone, but really we’re more together than we’ve ever been. Perhaps there is some comfort in that new truth.
These are the stages of grief. We may not think we are grieving right now. But what if we’re grieving our freedom, our plans for this Spring and the rest of the year? We could also be grieving the loss of connection with others and even our ability to work and earn money. If you’re feeling any of these things, have compassion for yourself. If you see others in denial or getting angry at the world, have compassion for them too. We’re all doing our best.
When things get out of control, when uncertainty seems to greet us where ever we turn, it’s easy to become overwhelmed. We like to think we can handle a crisis. We want to be the ones that people can count on. How do you do that when the bad news is overwhelming in its breadth and depth? I share a really grounding process in this post.
Stress affects your immune system. So getting calm is something else you can proactively do if you want to help out in the time of Corona. In this post I share some of the best tools I know to help you feel calm. Try the one (or ones) that feel good to you. Keep them handy in case you get triggered by the news, your social feeds or the people around you.
On this journey called Life, you are either moving towards something you want or moving away from something you don’t want. Or, maybe you’re stuck in neutral. Moving towards what you want means you’re fueled by desire and inspiration; Moving away from what you don’t want means you’re fueled by fear, pain, anxiety, confusion. One gets you where you want to go. The other makes you feel like you don’t fit in and that you need to keep searching. Take some time to figure out what you want. It’s worth the time and effort.
Wayfinding is the art of finding your own way in your life and in your work. There comes a time when doing what the culture says you “should” doesn’t work anymore. There is another way. It’s by using the ancient and modern tools of Wayfinding. In the middle of life, we know we want something different, but what? I help my clients figure that out, and I can help you. It’s never too late.
If I was running the world, there’d be a socially-acceptable mid-life gap year and places we could gather, like a Mid-Life University. The curriculum would include an inventory of who we are now, what we’ve come to care about, what’s new in the world, what the earth needs, a skill upgrade. We’d meet new people and make a plan for the rest of our lives. We wouldn’t have to do all this alone. In the meantime …
It’s a brand new year, a brand new decade. A clean slate. There’s a big, beautiful year stretching out in front of you and you have the opportunity to fill it with whatever you desire. You have everything you need to make your future better than your past! What do you want to create in 2020? Knowing what you want is half the magic. Read on to tap into your own magic and get the decade off to a great start!
< 2019 >
I should have titled this one simply, “You have time.” We run around at this time of year saying things like, “there’s no time”, “time is running out”, “I have no time.” Saying those things are simply not helpful. They make you rush which actually speeds up time. Try, “I have time.” See how that feels. Much better, right?
Do you believe that you can make a living doing what you love? Did you once beleive it and you don’t anymore? Are you worried that you need to make a big change in your life and this is freaking you out? Maybe. Maybe not. In this week’s blog we look at how changing how you think can make the world of difference.
Sometimes identifying where you are is half the battle. In my coaching practice I use Martha Beck’s the Change Cycle to help my clients understand that for everything there’s a season. When you’re in an Autumn in your career, it’s time to enjoy the fruits of your labor. And look to what’s next. But, just how do you do that?
Why is it so hard to take a break? One of the reasons is our culture is all about rewarding hustle, hard work, giving up your spare time. And then there’s the time we spend worrying when we’re not working. Is there a better way? What if rest was part of the process? What if you got rewarded for for resting instead of hustling?
Part 3 – I talk a lot about thoughts and beliefs. There’s good reason for that. So many of our thoughts are not helpful, and we don’t even know we’re having them. If you’re feeling stuck, if you’re not creating what you want in your life, if you don’t feel equipped to follow a dream, it’s likely that you have an unhelpful thought getting in the way. The Coaching Framework is a way to get past those thoughts. I lay that framework out in this post.
Part 2 – Last week, in Part 1 of this series, you went back over your life and collected all your dreams, gathering them all in one place. You connected your dreaming age to your dreams. Did you see any patterns? Any repeating dreams? Did you remember long lost ones? Did you see dreams that had already come true? In this dreaming space, as the week went along, did you remember long lost dreams? Or, get inspired by someone else’s dream? Let’s explore what to do with all this dreaming in this week’s post.
Part 1 – Chasing a dream can create a lot of conflict inside us. You feel torn between wanting more out of life and feeling grateful for your job. Or you worry you’re going to chase the wrong dream.
So often, you try to just be happy with what you have. That would be sooooo much easier. But, that pesky yearning won’t leave you alone. What do you really want? That’s the question. Where to start? Start with gathering all your dreams together. Start with the exercise in this week’s blog post.
Do you feel like you need to make a choice between your dreams and paying your bills?Do you feel like you get blocked whenever you try to pursue your dreams? Does it feel like dreams are for others who are brave, who are special, who don’t have responsibilities, who don’t have bills to pay? Does your work exhaust you? Do you spend your time away from work just recovering from your job? And then you do it again, and again? You may have the peace of mind that comes from being able to pay your bills, but you may also be paying another price . Maybe there’s another way. That’s the topic of this week’s post.
Don’t let another Summer get away from you. Today it’s Summer Solstice, the longest day of the year, the beginning of Summer. I’m setting an intention for my Summer this year and I invite you to do so too. What do you crave more of? How can you actually do those things you dream of? I provide some tools to begin in this week’s blog.
Sign up is now open for my Summer Book Club where we’re reading The Beautiful No by Sheri Salata. I’m gathering like-minded women to get inspired, get dreaming, and get going on our own dreams, using Sheri’s book as “the roadmap to transformation”, which is what Elizabeth Gilbert called it. To find out more and to sign up, click on the image above.
Elizabeth Gilbert calls Sheri Salata’s new book a “Roadmap for Transformation”. Sheri, who had a ginormous career as the former Executive Producer of the Oprah Winfrey Show, shares the story of her career, including her the framework she’s developed while transitioning from the corporate life to living the life of her dreams. In her words, she said she had a dream career, but not a dream life, so she’s been on a quest to create a next chapter that ticks more than the work box. She wants meaningful work, and so much more. I think so many of us can relate to this.
On every journey, we reach rough patches. They may be well-worn spots where we plop down because we can’t go any farther. Or, maybe it’s unfamiliar terrain. The going gets tough and you wonder why you thought any of this was a good idea. There’s power in negative feelings. This week we delve into accessing that power on your own behalf.
Not sure what to do? Feeling stuck? Is your work making you feel depleted, stressed, anxious, exhausted, burned out? Do you feel like you’ve tried everything, but nothing ever changes? Coaching can help you get unstuck. That’s because it’s not one-size-fits all. It’s a customized approach that’s gentle, yet strong; that’s precise, yet has a wide impact. It helps you get what you want. Here’s how to work with me …
In the book, Wisdom@Work, Chip Conley makes the case for the Modern Elder. Elders used to be important parts of society, their wisdom and experience honored and called upon in times of need. It’s only relatively recently that old has come to mean something negative. Could a new era be upon us? The age of the sage? Could we make it so?
It’s Spring! The best time of the year for dreaming, big ideas, growing. Take a cue from the flowers in your garden and all around you. Water what you’ve planted. It’s ready to be beautiful and be seen! A flower doesn’t even consider if it will fail. It just does it’s thing, reaching for the sun. You can do this too.
In coaching, I advocate you spend a little time dreaming. This isn’t some new-agey, affirmation, fantasy thing. It’s the idea that you don’t get your best ideas when you’re stressed out. In fact, when you’re stressed you get one or two ideas. When you get into creator space, you spark. How do you get into creator space? Read on.