Discover your true nature.
Discover Your True Nature
At one point in my career, I worked out of an office near the Toronto airport. One many winter evenings, after working late in my windowless office, I walked alone across the dark, icy, empty, industrial park parking lot.
With no trees to break its speed, the wind whipped at me, and I vowed more than once to get a coat that actually kept me warm. I hated it that vast parking lot. It seemed to symbolize the unending emptiness I felt those days.
Yet, I felt like I should be happy. I had it pretty good. So, why did I feel so bad?
Choice vs. Taking what's been handed to us.
For many of us, what has felt like a series of choices, has in fact been us taking what’s been handed to us. We take what’s next, what’s expected of us. We look around at others and take our cues from them.
This works really well when we’re younger. But there’s a certain point where it doesn’t feel right anymore. It’s not entirely wrong, but it’s not exactly right either, which makes it tricky. The temptation is to ignore this feeling, but when we do, it grows within us – this feeling of things not being quite right.
We're not always planted in the right place.
Without us really realizing it we’re often a flower in a desert or a cactus in a stream. Or, if you’re me, you’re a frozen flower unable to take root in an icy parking lot.
I did the right things, checked all the boxes, and still I wasn’t thriving. That’s because I spent my time trying to solve a symptom, not the root problem.
What exactly is the root problem?
We’ve lost track of our true nature. Instead of being where we’re meant to be, and growing and evolving in a natural way, we’re put our effort into solving the symptoms of trying to fit in. We look at depress as the problem to solve or even as a personal failing. We try to get over our depression, or manage our discontent, or hide on weekends to get our energy back.
If a flower isn't thriving, you don't blame the flower.
If your garden is lack-luster, you look at the soil, the water supply, the sunlight. You observe the seasons, and the cycles of nature. If a flower isn’t thriving, you don’t blame the flower.
You create the conditions for thriving and let the flower do its thing. It can’t get it wrong because it’s following its true nature.
How do you create the conditions for you?
Start with creating the conditions where you are now. What is your equivalent of nutritious soil, of life-giving water, of warm sunshine? What seeds are waiting to be planted? I realize there may be constraints, but what if …
Use the metaphor to come up with ideas for yourself.
Create Space – (A Plot for the Garden): What space could you create or carve out for yourself at work? Maybe it’s space for a new project. Maybe it’s to work less. Maybe it’s for a walk at lunchtime.
Give it Life: (Water): When are you in flow at work? Do you like working by yourself, or do you feel most yourself when leading a team?
Let it warm you: (Sunlight): Where and in what ways do you naturally shine? Is there a way to intentionally do more of that vs. what you think you “should” do? Can you delegate where you don’t shine?
Plant what you love – (Seeds, bulbs, plants): What vision, products, ideas have been floating around in your mind for a while? Could you Create Space (above) and start identifying (ideating, brainstorming) and narrowing it down? Could you plant seeds with others?
Open – (Bloom) Be curious. Be open to the new possibilities within you. I’m willing to bet that you have some great ideas that just need some space and nurturuing.
If you don’t know where to begin, start right at the beginning by getting to know your own ecology. Create the conditions for your own thriving to discover your true nature.
